Announcements, updates, randoms...

• Birth announcements have been ordered. If you would like one please email me your address. (use the about me and then contact me)

• Some really good friends of ours were "never going to have kids" (like T and I)....when we told them back in July that we were expecting their tune changed immediately to "we'll probably have kids some day"...they announced yesterday that they are 14 weeks pregnant. Congratulations to them. I am not sure how long they tried before reaching success, as I have not spoken to them yet, but wanted to congratulate them.

• I am getting ready to begin using our cloth diapers. They are in the washer now. I purchased the Bum Genius 3.0. I bought 24 of them back when I was like 6 or 7 months pregnant. I wanted to hold off on using them until Kira was a few weeks old and her "poop" cycle was a little more predictable. It's not there yet, but I really don't want to buy any diapers if I can help it. We have so many from my showers that I would like to have them as our travel diapers or babysitter diapers without having to buy too many more...

• Mom left yesterday so it is just me and the Princess today. I need to learn how to clean and care for a baby now. Mom was handling all the cleaning needs while she was here....

• Kira met her Great Grandparents yesterday. My Grandpa and Grandma are the only living Grandparents on both sides of our families. She is so lucky to not only have 3 of her 4 grandparents still alive, but also 2 of her Great Grandparents. After our visit with them yesterday it made me think a lot about my Grandma and how much I would have loved her to meet my Princess....

• I am dealing with a touch of a stomach bug yesterday and today, also have been on antibiotics for a few days for a double ear infection, and now my nose is getting awfully runny....

• I go back to work in 3 more weeks...how depressing.

Real or Not...

..I don't care. Whether it is gas, or involuntary muscle movement, or the real thing.....How could you not love when she looks at you like this....

And look at these big blue eyes....

My piglet....

We took Kira in for her 2nd check up today...10 days ago she was 8.5 and 21.5in...today she is 9.3 and 22.5 in!! A full inche longer and almost a full pould heavier...what a lunker!

Before the appt I met one of my very best friends, Nicole's mom Teri for a late breakfast. She had the chance to meet Kira and we caught up on all the new things in my life and hers. When we went to leave she gave me a HUGE gift. I naturally opened there in the parking lot, because I wanted to open it while still with her. It was a "Sweetpeace Newborn Soothing Center". It is SUPER cool. Kira loves it. It can be positioned in multiple ways to rock or sway. To vibrate on high or low. To play 5 sounds (water, waves, storm, womb, nature), music (3 preset sounds or MP3 player). It reclines into 3 positions...just AWESOME! (check out the video at the bottom of this entry)

After the Dr. Appt I attempted to take my girl for a walk. It was really nice out (40 degrees). I bundled her up plopped her in the stroller and off we went...not so successful. She was crying most of the time, I wound up having to carry her back and have my Mom push the stroller. Oh well it was a nice try...we'll do it again until she likes it.

updated pics today...

in the same place as usually....Flickr

Sleep....

...I miss you. Now is when I wish I could take from that Bank I referred to previously.

It is 3:55am...Kira got me up at 1:30am. I was done feeding her by 2:00 and tried (unsuccessfully) multiple times to get her back down...FINALLY at 3:45 she is out....but now I am WIDE AWAKE. DAMN IT.

T has to work all day tomorrow (today), which means it is me and Mom. Kira has been really fussy during the daytime, so I hate to leave my Mom high and dry to take care of her so I can sleep while she is being a fuss pot.

Today will be her 1st bath too! The cord fell off yesterday but we never had the chance to do a bath, so today is the day.

I'll try to update Flickr today too. LOTS of new pics. (even some decent ones of me with her).

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Update on weight loss....I wore my White House Black Market size 8 jeans yesterday! WOO HOO! Nothing like being able to ft into your most expensive jeans again!

Still have a little pouch, but I will be starting some pelvis tilts and light crunches this week to help with that. I REALLY hope to be lower than pre pregnancy weight when I return to work (March 23).....

Windows...

No one told me that life would be lived in 3 hour windows once I had a baby. I have to accomplish anything I need to get done in this very short period of time.

Here is my typical day during the past 10 days......

Kira gets her diaper changed....Kira gets a bottle....Kira takes about 30 minutes to eat 3oz......Kira falls asleep immediately following bottle (or as I call it goes into her "Coma")....Kira sleeps for 2-3 hours (on a rare occasion 4 hours).

During those 2-3 hours I should be taking a nap...but I am not. I am doing laundry, dishes, taking a shower, folding clothes, making bottles...the list goes on.

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I successfully ventured out of the house with her, alone, on my 3rd day home. We had to take a trip to the Hospital to pick up some bottle nipples (there was a couple of days where the only nipples she would take were the ones from the Hossy), stopped to visit my sister and her co-workers at the bank, and went to Marshall's to get her some girl clothes. By the time I was in line at Marshall's she was starting to get really fussy. I crossed my fingers and hoped to make it home (30 mins away) before she flipped out. Luckily she LOVES the car and passed out right away.

Other than that trip her only other out of the house experiences have been to her 1st Dr. appt (she weighed 1oz more than birth weight at 4 days old!) and to drop my car off at the garage for work on Sunday...otherwise it has just been to damn cold to venture out. We will be doing a little more next week, especially since my Mom is here and it makes it a lot easier with two of us.

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She is pretty much a really good baby. She has NO routine at this point. Each day is different from the one before. The only consistency is that she is a fussy little witch daily from 7-10. No matter what her day was like, we can count on her crying (more like SCREAMING bloody murder) for those hours. T is the only one that can calm her at that time, so he is on daddy duty nightly during the witching hours. (I think by that time of the day she is so sick of me!)

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I have been trying to update Flickr every couple of days. I will make sure to get more out there over the next day or two...I have some funny pics of the family (T, Me, Kira and Cat) all cuddled on the couch, Kira sleeping on Mommy's chest (the only place she would sleep all day today)...as well as just random shots of her from each day. Gotta love digital!

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So I guess that's it for now, sorry for the lack of commenting...I have not read any blogs in like 5 days. I hope to get online a little more tomorrow (T and Mom will both be home all day) and catch up..Miss you all~

Pictures!!!

I posted some pics of Kira's first few days here.

She has been FABULOUS during the hours of 6am and 10pm...and then all hell breaks loose from 11-5 ! She is super fussy at night, won;t be put down, won;t sleep, just eats and cries...

I was able to get a 2 hour nap yesterday when we came home. My MIL and T hung out with her and took care of dishes and stuff while I tried to get some shut eye.

T was really sick last night, cold sweats, crampy legs, migraine..(you'd think he had the baby!) so he slept most of the night while I was up with her. Although we did get a nice round of sleep this morning. I fed her at 4am and she was out like a light until almost 9am! I actually had to wake her up cause I knew her diaper had to be soaked...and it was.

Once again she is out cold after eating this morning. I will be getting her up soon to do a change and feeding just to have you crash again :) During that nap...I'll be sleeping too. Hard to believe that this little person takes SO much energy out of a person!

Enjoy the pics.

Birth story....Kira Kendall Rand

Short version:

Kira Kendall Rand was born at 2:20pm (not sure where I got the 4:40 that I put in my text msg) on 2/8/09 after 24 hours of some really hard labor....she weighed 8.4 and was 20 inches long..head full of dark long hair, screaming loud and proud....

Long story:

I woke up Sat am not feeling "right" and within minutes lost my plug. My day progressed with some cramping and mild contraxs. Around 2:30 pm my contraxs began to become more uniform and timeable. By 4:00 they were 6 minutes apart and strong, but still tolerable. I called the Dr and she said come on onto the Hospital over the next couple of hours and we'll check you out...Called T to get him out of work and we arrived at the Hossy around 6:30 pm.
I was not admitted right away, but put in a room and hooked up to the monitors.

By this time contraxs were approx 4 mins apart and getting really strong (or so I thought...)The nurse staff checked me and I was only a finger tip dilated (such a downer). The pain was getting really bad so they gave me a shot of Stadol in the thigh and let me labor on for another couple of hours..around 10pm they checked me again (contraxs still @4 mins apart) and I was STILL a finger tip. The pain was getting really really bad...they gave me the option to a) go home and continue laboring through this part b) get admitted and stay here....umm yeah which one would you pick? So they admitted me and gave me my IV and administered more stadol.

Around 3:30 am I awoke to the absolute most worse pain I had ever endured in my entire life. I screamed so loud that every single floor nurse and T ran to my bed side. They checked me again and I was 5CM!! YEAH freakin hoorah!! So the Dr. was called in and the Epi was put in (on a side note..my EPI experience was AWESOME-no pain, the guy was great) and I was on my way towards delivery!

Almost immediately after getting my Epi I fell asleep for a couple of hours..when I was checked again around 10:30 I was still 5CM, so they started me on PITOCIN to help get the contraxs up again and at that time the Dr. broke my water. There was merconium in the water, however through out the day my fluids became clear.

Shortly after starting the PIT I noticed I was feeling the contraxs. They were not horrible, but I could definitely feel them. Also I noticed my back was wet…the Epi had become disconnected and was leaking all over my bed! They re-connected me…my Epi relief was never the same after this point..kind of spotted/uneven, and not as strong.

Because the Epi had slightly warn off I was able to move around a bit, so my Dr. changed my position to be on all 4’s butt in the air head down low, for about half an hour. Then I laid on each side for about another half hour each…then she checked me again around 1:00pm and I was 10CM!

She said, It may take a couple hours since it’s your first..Feel free to push when you get the need and when you get a lot of rectal pressure call me…Well T and I did some light pushing through contraxs for the next hour, she came in to check me at 2:00 and could see her head!

....20 mins later (and approx 6 more pushes) and she was out…

I have two 1st degree tears as well as a 1st degree cut she had to make to my hymen. So my lady parts are a bit sore…Feels like I am sitting on a baseball!

Kira came into the world SCREAMING and didn’t not stop for hours. She is a little bit of a princess already. She has a full head of very dark hair. She scored 9/9 on her apgars. She lost 2% weight within 6 hours (down to 8.1). We are still in the Hossy, until tomorrow.

Once I get home I’ll update my blog with some pics. I am so glad to have my baby in my arms…

more to come on T's participation in the birth....he was awesome!!

Its a girl! Kira Kendall Rand was born @ 4:40. 8.4lbs 20inch. Lots of dark curly hair!

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As of 8am, 5cm, 100 eff, merc in water, epi kìcking ass, pitocin started. Were having a baby today!

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Heading to the hospital...

...hopefully this is the real thing...

Additional TMI....

...definitely having some more bloody leakage. But only when I go to the bathroom and wipe. Nothing is leaking onto the pad in between bathroom breaks...

Super bad cramps, like my period is in full force, but nothing that is feeling like contractions...at least what I think contractions should feel like.

I am going to wait a few more hours, take a nice warm shower, stay hydrated...my sister will be coming over soon to hang out with me since T went to work.

I hate to get too excited...but really want this to be it! At least I feel like it could really be the beginning of "it"....

Morning sunshine...

...so I took a day off from reading, writing, speaking and commenting.. It helped me clear my mind.

I really want all of this to end in as "natural" (I will be taking the drugs) as possible and want to do what is best for my baby and my body...it is just really hard when to stay positive at this point, especially if you are like me and belong to a couple of message boards...where the women due 2-3 weeks after me are already delivering their babies. It brings me back to when I was trying to get pregnant and I would see all these women getting their accidental positive tests or one cycle and wham we are pregnant! Not that it took me a long time, but when you are trying every month is a long time...

Anyway...thanks for your comments and your patience with me..

WARNING TMI to follow...

I haven't been feeling well the past few days...digest issues on both ends (we'll leave it at that). T and the cat also haven't been feeling well so I figured we all have a bit of a bug or something...but in the back of my mind know that often digest issues are a sign of labor coming...When I woke up this morning I sat up on the side of the bed for a few minutes, stretching my legs and hands, acclimating to the new day....when suddenly "goosh" I felt this wet rush between my legs. I reached down and my fingers were instantly wet! I stood up frightened almost and ran to the bathroom.

I do not think my water broke (but god that would be F'ing great!) but DO think I lost my plug finally. It was a small amount of fluid (mostly clear with a tinge of yellow and red) and some mucous. I am totally aware that losing your plug means a whole lotta nothing, but at this stage of the "game" I am psyched that it happened!

Someone who knows something here...correct me if I am wrong...but in order to lose your plug doesn't your cervix need to be dilating? Which causes it to fall (slip) out? Or could you still be totally closed up tight and lose your plug?

So anyway, I was shocked and excited at the same time. But am remaining calm...I put on a panty liner to monitor if I am "leaking" at all. If I see any more fluid come out, I am calling the Dr. to ask if it could have been my water breaking..but like I said it wasn't a huge amount of fluid...but it wasn't a tiny amount either...

We'll see....

And we continue....

Had my appts today...and now I am home.

The Non Stress test looked good, baby is very happy where he or she resides and has NO plans on making an entrance anytime soon....Doctor checked me, cervix is still not dilated at all. She said it is a little soft, but not really worth mentioning...

We are planning on beginning the induction process next week (wed night). As long as no medically necessary births bump me out of the list I will be admitted at some point on Wed and get a Foley catheter, then on Thursday they will begin the induction with pitocin, then I should have the baby by Friday...or a c-section would take place then. She agreed to come in and deliver me. Gave me her cell and beeper number and promised to be the one to be there with me, so I agreed to waiting until next week. Maybe I will luck out and my cervix will begin to cooperate......maybe

Figures, my Mom will be here Sat (2/14). And I planned it so that T and I would have hopefully had a baby at home for at least a few days to get used to it without a house full of people...and now I won't even be out of the hospital when she gets here!

I am very upset, very emotional, in a lot of pain....just want to be done with this. I will be taking a couple days off from the phones and internet..I need to clear my mind and get myself back into a stable emotional state....

Mundane existence...

It's too early to be up....but I just can't sleep.

I feel like a girl that is about to start my first day of school, a first job, taking a long anticipated trip......nervous, anxious, excited. And for what? For the slight hope that I may be granted the right to meet my baby today or tomorrow...

T took me out last night to the mall. Now any of you that know him IRL would know that the Mall is not a place he elects to visit. But I was super stir crazy yesterday after enduring yet another snow storm this week and needed to walk it off.

We started off at Barnes and Noble to finish spending our gift cert from BIL...In total we managed to get 1 book (what to expect the first year), 7 CD's (3 Steven Stills, 1 Neil Young, 1 Bruce Springsteen, 1 Gary Louris/Mark Olsen, and I am drawing a blank on the 7th...), 1 DVD of O'Brother where art thou, and seasons 3 and 4 of the office....all of this for $2.97 out of pocket...not a shabby xmas gift if you ask me!

After the book store we headed over to the main mall area. I had 2 items in mind I wanted...new slip on shoes (I had seen a kiosk there a few weeks ago that had the ones I wanted in black) and maybe some Red Zinger or Raspberry leaf tea (OWT's to get labor started)....finding neither. We walked the mall twice and had dinner at California Pizza Kitchen. By the time we finished dinner I was having those upper leg/lower pains again, so we crawled our way back through the mall to the car and headed home. The rest of the night was SUPER uneventful...

People just keep calling, texting, emailing me wanting to know "Where's the baby" "What is the hold up" and giving me all the *advice* I have heard 500000000 times...have sex, drink tea, go for walks, clean the car, etc....yeah yeah yeah...do you really think I have not tried like everything (other than the castor oil thing). All it does is piss me off more that I haven't gone into labor myself. I know they are anxious too...but hello people, do you think I am not? I am nearly a week over due. And those of you that know me IRL...know I HATE to be late for ANYTHING so my lack of control over this is F'ing killing me!

I think I am done responding...let them think I am labor.

I'm tired....

...of sleeping. I know I will so *regret* that statement soon, but the reality is, that all I feel like I do is sleep right now. It's not like I can bank it for later and pull out parts from reserve when I need it. I am just doing it out of boredom.

I am asleep most nights by 11 or 12 and don't get up most mornings until 10 or 11. Granted I am peeing like once ever 90 mins, but I do that in a sleep mode. I don't need to fully wake to go into the bathroom.

Sorry about the false alarm last night..I really thought "something" was happening. I began to get these different feelings. The pains were starting in my upper-inner thigh/hip joint areas and radiating into my lower belly. It was a very hot, very tight pain. It would stop my in my tracks for a good 50 seconds...and then go away for about 14 mins before returning again...this went on for a couple of hours and then just stopped....

Please don't comment back to me that my body is "practicing or warming up" because I am done with the practice rounds already..I just want to play the F'ing game now. I appreciate that my body is preparing, but enough is enough. I have been having these f'ing cramps and contraxs for nearly a month or more already.

If nothing happens today we go to the Dr. tomorrow morning and I think I am going to cave in and actually request and induction ~shudder~. The ONLY reason I am considering this is because I have a feeling there will be complications (such as the need for delivery assistance or C section) and my Dr. is the delivery Dr. until Sunday night, after that it is her partner. After spending 9 months with my Dr. I would just feel SO SO much better having complications (or a nice easy birth) with her by my side than her partner.

Don't get me wrong, her partner is really nice too. But I don't "know" her. If I were a new patient as of today I would have structured my appt schedule to see them both equally, but that's not how it was for me. People keep telling me "when the time comes you won't care who is delivering you" well I think that is bullshit-sorry but my blog my thoughts. To me that's like saying I could have another women's husband come in, hold my hand and count for me, cause at the moment it won't matter. I feel like I need to be with the two people I trust the most in this particular situation....

Anyway, so as I said, if nothing happens on it's own today, I may be requesting and induction tomorrow. No matter what she already said she would induce me by 2/11 (when she is not the delivery Dr.) so at this point what is a couple of days?

Dang it...

...keep em crossed though...

Fingers crossed!!

That's all I'm saying for now....fingers crossed ALL OF YOU!!

Movies, movies and more...

...movies...I am becoming quite the couch potato!

...while watching O' brother where art thou the other day it made me think of other movies that I love that have some of those actors....John Turturro is a great actor and tends to choose really great films to act in. Box of Moon Light was one of them. I'll be adding it to my netflix list tonight as it's been a while since I saw it. It was one of those movies I grabbed off the shelf of the movie store (remember those?) I think because he was on the cover. I didn't read the description, just grabbed it cause I liked him. It wound up being a pretty great flick..

..another movie that has been on my mind lately is Twin Falls Idaho. This was another one of those GEMS discovered on accident at the video store. It is a really dark story about conjoined twin brothers. A must see in my book and another one getting added to netflix tonight..

..one that we watched on Saturday night that is worth watching if you would like a good cry (I swear even T was ready to cry) was The things we lost in the fire. It had actors in it that I would normally not go out of my way to watch (Halle Berry and David Duchovny) but did have one of the all time great actors in it, Benicio del Toro. The movie had several levels to it...the struggle of death, losing your soul mate, dealing with drug addiction, learning how to forgive.....just a really sad story.. it'll be ranked high on my list for a while..

I am trying to be ready....

...thanks to Nancy I set myself up to send text messages to my blog...Don't expect there to be a marathon update while in labor though...

I'll let you know A) I am in labor! and B) Baby was born and stats...

Hell it took me like 8 minutes just to text "Testing 123"

Testing 123.

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new pics....

...rather than updating the previous post I figured I would throw a separate one up here.....

You can go to my flickr page to see my progression....or just look below at the latest pics...

I still don't think I look (or feel) like I am dropping...your thoughts?

D Day has come.....

...or so one would believe based on my ticker to the right...did you see it? I have 0 weeks and 0 days left. So does that mean I am having a baby today? Most likely the answer to that is no...and what the heck will happen to it tomorrow?

Pregnancy lasts an average of 280 days. That's 40 weeks or exactly 10 lunar months (lunar months are 28 days).......

I have been waiting for this day, today, February 1, 2009, for 252 days! 36 weeks! 9 exact lunar months.....

I tested positive for this pregnancy on 5/25/08. I was super duper hung over after our kick ass Memorial day BBQ and was convinced that all the beer I drank made it positive....yup, cause that happens (lol). So I tested again that night and took the always saved till last, the coveted digital test the next day....all were positive, before I told T.

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Every book, every article you read. Every Dr. you speak to. Every previously pregnant woman that gives you advise....all will tell you "Do not hold onto your Due Date. It means no more than the fact that you will have a baby somewhere within 4 weeks of that date" But when you are given that date it is like finding the golden ticket in the chocolate bar...the countdown begins.

I didn't listen to them...my calendar for today has in big writing on it "Baby Rand Due!".

As uncomfortable as I am, I really don't want to be induced..the pain associated with all the added drugs just sounds horrible and I want this little one to have the chance to do things on their own. However I am worried that if I do not begin to labor on my own before my appointment on Thursday that my Dr. is going to make the suggestion that we begin induction. I guess it will all depend on what the Non Stress test shows.

My other fear is that this "little one" is becoming a "big one" the longer s/he remains in there! When we saw the U/S a couple weeks back (checking the head position) the head appeared huge! T joked and said "Oh no, it has my big ole Swedish head" SHIT is all I could think/say. His head is really fucking big! (finding baseball caps is very difficult for him) And if my baby's head is really fucking big I need to squeeze that out....oh shit....

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So I leave you today with the fact that today is my EDD (Estimated Due Date), there are no signs of labor beginning at this point in the day (9:34am).....I will update this post later today with my 40 Week picture (so if you are here now...come back later too)